


Coffee for Stoners

by gooeyWitch (DeviiPyjamas)



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Cafe Charge because im unoriginal, F/F, Humanstuck, M/M, POV Alternating, Recreational Drug Use, Sollux with a Lisp, Tags May Change, Warnings May Change, in which gamzee dyes his hair a lot, in which sollux is apparently friends with every-fucking-body
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-09-12
Updated: 2014-09-11
Packaged: 2018-02-17 01:48:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,598
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2292428
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DeviiPyjamas/pseuds/gooeyWitch
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Tavros and Aradia own a cafe, where a particular customer catches Tavros's eye.</p><p>Meanwhile Aradia has her eyes on someone, too. And Sollux is totally not attracted to her friend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Coffee for Stoners

**Author's Note:**

> im so unoriginal goodbye

Your name is Tavros Nitram. You and your good friend Aradia run a cafe together. You have a man named James Egbert working for you, making cakes, along with his daughter, Jane Crocker. Aradia's adopted brother, Sollux, works as, uh – the one who is managing the money.

 

You're from Mexico – well, not really. Your parents were from Mexico. You were born in the states. Your mom died when you were little, in the same car accident that left you crippled for years. You went through a lot of therapy for that. It was just you, your dad, and your brother for a long time. Then your dad died in an accident at work. You were probably fifteen then. Your brother was eighteen by that time, so he got custody of you. You're twenty now, and relatively happy.

 

Aradia and Sollux are both Asian, but Aradia's Japanese while Sollux is half-Korean. Aradia's mom adopted the Captor brothers when Aradia was three, and someone had adopted them before, but returned them when they found out Mituna was special needs (and Mituna wouldn't separate from his younger brother).

 

Mr. Egbert is pretty much just a white guy. But he's really nice and makes hella good cakes. Same with Jane, really.

 

Your cafe is small but successful. You have a pretty steady amount of customers, and make enough money to sit a little above “sea-level”. It's your turn to man the coffee station, while Aradia lounges at one of the tables, on break. You glance at the clock on the wall above the door.

 

“It's almost time,” you say to Aradia. She looks at the clock and smiles. Sollux creeps down from the upstairs office.

 

The bell at the door rings as two customers come in. Every day, around noon, these two come in. Aradia has a huge crush on the girl, and Sollux has a crush on the boy, though he says he's just distracted by the gaudiness of him.

 

“Hi, Tavros,” the girl greets you as she comes up to the counter. Sollux has, at this point, grabbed a cake and is sitting with Aradia, glaring at the man standing in front of him (who isn't even facing his direction so it makes no sense for Sollux to glare).

 

The girl is short and chubby (kind of like yourself), with long, brown hair that falls in waves down her back. Her skin is somewhat dark and covered in freckles. Her overall appearance screams “friendly”, from her constant smile to her deep, brown eyes. Her friend is nothing like that.

 

He's tall, really tall, and skinny with black hair that has a purple-dyed streak. His skin is a little paler than hers, but just as freckled. He has huge glasses taking up his face. He always seems to be simultaneously squinting and scowling. He also “wears a goddamn scarf in the middle of the fucking summer like the hipster douche he is”, as Sollux puts it. You serve them their normal order, and they move to sit at one of the window seats today. Hipster-douche is now returning Sollux's glare. They stay like that until Hipster-douche and the nice girl have to leave. Sollux goes back up to his office just as silently as when he came down.

 

Hours pass by peacefully with the normal flow of customers, and eventually, you're on your break while Aradia mans the coffee.

 

“Five o'clock,” Aradia all-but sings. You roll your eyes. Sollux comes back down for coffee, but this time with some of his work with him. The bell above the door rings.

 

“I swear to god, Gamzee, I _know_ my romcoms are terrible. That's _why_ I love them,” the shorter one says as he stomps in, his tall, lanky friend trailing him. Every day, they come in at five, an hour before you close, and stay until you do. Aradia likes to tease you for your crush on the tall guy – Gamzee, apparently – just like you tease her for her crush on that girl.

 

Every time they come in, they order a different coffee. Gamzee always gets whatever our special of the day is, and a pie. The other one just gets something different and loads it up with sugar and cream.

 

The tall one's – uh, Gamzee's – hair is currently bright green. Every week, at some point, he dyes it differently. The two of them move to sit at a window table – the one right next to yours.

 

“Whatever you say, Karbro,” Gamzee says. His voice is deep and rough-sounding. It alternates between being almost a whisper and being kind of loud – not quite yelling, but almost. You sip at your rapidly cooling coffee as you watch from the edge of your vision.

 

“Karbro” is extremely pale, with equally pale blue eyes. His hair is obviously dyed black, the roots are white-blonde and so are his eyebrows. He always looks angry, but he and Gamzee are always together when they walk in.

 

Gamzee is very much the opposite. He's tall – taller than the hipster guy – with dark skin (darker than yours) covered in tattoos. His hair is... Hard to explain. It's usually really messy and tangled, but every-so-often he comes in with dreads. Actual dreads – not what white people think are dreads. He's even come in with his hair in a huge braid a few times. Today it's natural – which looks like an afro, if you're going to be honest about it. He has numerous piercings in his ears, including small gauges. He's an interesting guy.

 

Oh, and he wears grey and white, clown-themed face paint. Yeah, he's pretty interesting.

 

You aren't really sure _why_ you like him so much. Maybe it's his laid back attitude. Maybe it's because he's tall (You like tall people. Your last girlfriend was a foot taller than you – although she was a little terrifying and you're kind of glad to not be dating her anymore. But you still talk to her.) Or maybe it's because he came in one day earlier in the summer with a tank top on and you saw that he actually has muscles for how lanky he looks.

 

He yawns and oh god he has a tongue piercing. Oh _god_.

 

You have to look away because you're staring and blushing and you don't want them to notice. Sollux sits across from you, snickering. The short one glances over, but returns to quietly conversing with Gamzee.

 

“Tho, TV, I need to talk to you about thome catering requethtth we've had,” Sollux states, sipping his coffee.

 

“Oh, really? What kind?” you lean forward, thankful for the distraction you know he's purposefully giving you.

 

“Mothtly birthday partieth. Jameth and Jane make hella good caketh. You thould know, you hired them,” he tells you, smirking. He does that a lot.

 

You two talk about work and some other things – video games, mostly – while you ignore the glances Gamzee is giving you. Aradia calls you to come back to work. Sollux creeps away upstairs. When you get up to go back to work, a hand grabs your wrist. You turn to find Gamzee holding it – lightly, so if you wanted you could get away.

 

“Um,” you swallow. “Do you, uh, need something?” He lets go of your wrist and fiddles a bit with his hands.

 

“Uh, nevermind,” he looks away from you. The tips of his ears are red. He's blushing. You mumble an 'okay' and go back to work. You hear a thud and a small grunt of pain, and you're pretty sure his friend just kicked him under the table. A hand grabs your sleeve. You turn, and it's the short one. Then again you aren't much taller than he is.

 

“Listen,” he's whispering. Considering you've only heard two volumes from him – loud and louder – this is a surprise. “Gamzee really likes you. He thinks you're cute or whatever. He's been working up on asking you out, but as you can tell, he chickened out.” You glance at Gamzee, rubbing his shin under the table and pouting. “So anyway. I wanna know. Do you like him? I don't know why you would if you do, but do you?”

 

“U-um, yeah,” you stutter quietly. His pale brows rise up in surprise.

 

“Wow, I wasn't expecting that. Anyway, ask him out or something since he's too chickenshit to do it,” he whispers. An older couple nearby glance at him scornfully.

 

“O-okay,” you swallow nervously. You can't afford to do it now though, you need to get back to work. Short-guy walks back over to Gamzee and sits, glaring at you. You go back to work, serving coffee and soon after, wiping down tables before you close. Gamzee and his friend are preparing to leave. You gasp and grab a napkin and pen.

 

“U-um,” you mumble, and they both look at you. “Here!” You thrust the napkin in Gamzee's direction, and you try to smile, but you're so nervous that it probably comes out weird. Gamzee takes it without a word and a strange look on his face. You rush behind the counter and upstairs, unable to face them any longer. Once you get up there, you let out a squeal.

 

**BONUS GAMZEE POINT OF VIEW YEEHAW**

 

You and your best friend, Karkat, exit your usual cafe with the cute barista.

 

“So what is that?” Karkat asks, referring to the napkin.

 

“It's his motherfuckin cell phone number,” you say quietly, in disbelief. “I got his motherFUCKIN CELL PHONE NUMBER!” you yell this time, disturbing pigeons and passerby alike as you do a little jig.

 

What a motherfucking miraculous day.

**Author's Note:**

> i fuckin give up i gIVE UP goodbye


End file.
